2008
so its been forever n a day since i wrote on here … i believe iv grown alil over the past year.. yes i still like a big goof ball ..im now in ohio for another week then im movin to iowa to live for awhile my friend ashli ecalled me a drifter. which may be true but when you get a wake call you try to take to heart and do everythjing you can to make things happen.. i can say iv made mistakes big ones at that ..and i dont regret anything iv done cuz ive grown from everything ive been threw and everything ive done a few times i didnt think i could make it threw but i did there was so many time i just wanted to give up and i didnt once or twice then i would get a wake up call knowin if i didnt fight who would?.. so i couldnt just be weak like everybody thought i was. so now im really finding myself it scaresd me alil cuz i know im still just a kid at heart but i learn to deal with that fear everyday .. so me and my mom never gets along , but im learnin i have to be the bigger person n call her to see how everbody is doing and stuff.. although she still only calls me when she needs money which kills alil everytime cuz i would love for her just call me one to just see how im doing ..i couldnt even call when i went threw the whole preg. scare .. i wasnt ready for a kid you know but i was ready to take care it.. amonth a week i had a miscarage.. it was one of the most emotional things i went threw and still goin threw thats my best like sister friend bonnie she was there for me 1000% ive never cried so much before and all i wanted to do was go to my mom but i was scared for her to know but i dealt with it and she doesnt know and i geuss she may never.. i told the guy about it after like 3 weeks of it happenin he was shocked and kinda hurt that i had lost the baby.. he wants to marry me but neither of our familys like each other so like his fam dont like me and my mom dont like him so that has had a big drama thing for the past 5months.. so now im movin and startin a life in iowa i hope it all will work for the best..well gotta go ..peace..
